Twisted Wish Revival!

[MagickalMemories]

I wish this cold would go away.

Granted.
The cold goes away.
It is replaced by a horrible itching and small creatures crawling around your "short and curlies."


I wish I could wake up a bit easier in the morning.

Eric

[montaa]

I wish I could wake up a bit easier in the morning.

Eric

Granted.
Except you're now at gitmo and they waterboard you every morning trying to learn the inner secrets of Lin's mind.

[MagickalMemories]

I wish I could wake up a bit easier in the morning.

Eric

Granted.
Except you're now at gitmo and they waterboard you every morning trying to learn the inner secrets of Lin's mind.

The fools.
They'll get nothing from me!

Also... Where is your wish, Montaa?
How can we abuse you, if you do not put yourself on the line for us?

Do it! Do it now!
Lay open your soul to us, that we may devour it and taunt you for our own perverse amusements!

[porkuslime]

I am SURE montaa meant to write..

I wish I could think of a Wish they can Twist!

[Norseman]

I wish Montaa would wish for something!!!

[montaa]

I wish the coffee I drank had allowed me to remember a wish about fish.

[MagickalMemories]

I wish the coffee I drank had allowed me to remember a wish about fish.

Wish granted!
Congratulations!

You remember that your wish about fish was sexual in nature. Also... Piranha.
It starts off FAR better than it ends.

Your friends (and wife) have now nicknamed you "Stubby."


I wish I had been the person in Missouri who won the $258.5 Million Powerball jackpot.

[Shirokuma]

I wish I had been the person in Missouri who won the $258.5 Million Powerball jackpot.

Wish Granted!

You won the Powerball! You took the cash, which means you have $129.25 Million. After taxes, you have $69.5 Million. And after paying the kidnappers who stole your family, then the lawyers and the P.I.s who DIDN'T find your family, you're back to square one.

I wish i wasn't so cynical.

[montaa]

I wish i wasn't so cynical.

Wish granted, you are no longer a cynic. Unfortunately you've been transformed into Rainbow Bright and some called the Purple Pie Man is chasing your ass.

I wish someone would donate a beautifully painted Brettonian army to me.

[MagickalMemories]

I wish someone would donate a beautifully painted Brettonian army to me.

Wish granted.

It's a besieged Prince in an African nation. All he needs is some information about you, including your bank account number...

I wish Shiro knew enough about me to know I wouldn't pay the kidnappers.

[Norseman]

OMG!!! I laughed out load at work!! People are staring now...LOL

I wish Shiro knew enough about me to know I wouldn't pay the kidnappers.

Wish Granted!!!

You enter a time machine and go back in time and do not pay the Kidnappers. In a weird twist of fate the Kidnappers actually return you family (have fun). You miserly and wisely invest all of your money and it doubles in a year. Your wife gets sick of your miserly ways and starts putting ground glass in your meals. You die a horribly painful death. Your family actually installs a rotisserie in your grave on a lark, (you continually turn over in your grave) They laugh!!! You family goes wild and blows the money in 6 months on absolute crap and all die penniless.

I wish I was all muscle and no fat!!

[MagickalMemories]

So, you're saying that I still manage to be free from my wife AND she ends up not being rich for the rest of her life?
Tell me how this wish is "Twisted," exactly?
LOL

Congratulations. You're 0% body fat.

Consider this:
It's part of:

- every cell membrane
- some hormones and prostaglandins (hormone-like substances) which regulate many body functions
- nerve sheaths (nerve coverings)

Essential fat is found in bone marrow and lipid rich tissues throughout the body. Storage fat is located around internal organs and under the skin (subcutaneous). These two types of body fat play important roles in keeping our bodies healthy. For example:

- A layer of fat surrounds each organ (such as your heart, liver, kidneys, etc.), protecting and cushioning it against impact during sports or accidents,
- Fat helps maintain normal body temperature.
- Fat provides us with a supply of stored energy, which can sustain us if food is not available.

Congratulations. You're ripped as Hell... and dead.

[Adunaphel]

I would hope that certain members (ahem) would remember to wish so that it can be twisted. Twisting is all good (I remember the old black and white vids), but it's hard to twist without either a wish or Chubby Checker.


So, I wish that from here out someone either hires Chubby Checker to come here and oversee procedings OR actually inserts a wish at the end of their post.

[MagickalMemories]

...and the master becomes the student...

:bows to Adunaphel:

My humble apologies. In my haste (stupid work got in the way), I totally forgot to complete the post.

I wish I was farther from "Chubby Checker" and closer to "0% body fat." LOL

Eric


P.S. Just in case it matters, I'll grant your wish, Adun.
I hired Chubby Checker. He's a male stripper now (ALL nude). He comes over and shows you the NEW version of "The twist."
On your lap.
In private.
And you like it.

[Norseman]

I wish I was farther from "Chubby Checker" and closer to "0% body fat." LOL

Wish Granted!

You feel yourself slimming down magically. However you also notice yourself getting pale. It was then you realized your mistake. You become an extremely thin albino. Have fun picking up chicks looking like that.

(Chubby Checker was black and MM is white for all you that don't understand)

I wish I had a real suit of space marine power armor that fit me.