I've said it before....

[EVIL INC]

I'm currently in a trade (only waiting for my M.O. and it is all finished) where the transaction has taken well over a month. Throughout it all, we have kept in at LEAST weekly contact with one another to get/give updates. When I did not have time to scrounge and look (mtg card can be a PAIN to search through) or just did not fee like it, I let him know and he was perfectly understanding as he was in no hurry and understands how it is. After all of this time with perfectly amicable communications, I fully expect to get my M.O. within a day or so and we can put our references for one another in.
Communication is key and really not that hard. If all else fails, go to a buddies house of an evening and borrow their computer. Will give you an excuse to hang out for an hour or so.

[Ironhide]

It also occurs to me that in the past we have berated people for not acting quick enough, now we are getting on them for acting too hasty. Can't have it both ways.

No, we can't. However, we can expect "reasonable" timeliness, which is generally somewhere between 2 days and 2 weeks. Expecting same-day turnaround by one's trade partner, or waiting months are both excessive.

Not quick enough
- waiting more than a few days to inventory items received
- waiting more than a few days to send items / payment owed
- waiting more than a week to contact trade partner with regular status update
- waiting more than a couple weeks to contact trade partner when something goes wrong
- letting the (~30-day) eBay / PayPal / whatever dispute period expire when something goes wrong

too hasty
- expecting reply without giving partner a few days to respond
- expecting payment / shipment without giving partner a few days to send
- posting BTR without giving partner a few days to respond
- posting Neg without giving partner a few days to make right

There is a balance, and it's not hard to find.

Of course, if people would simply set and follow timetables, this all becomes a lot easier.

/John
____

@fitterpete: I'm sorry you got kicked out of your home, but given a few days, you can certainly get back to your trade partners. If RL is too important, then you'll get the BTRs and Negs that you deserve. Expecting people to give you slack when you don't even bother to communicate isn't reasonable.

All good ideas/tips. However, you sometimes will encounter individuals who don't care if you could/would make it right; which is what I think happened in carmachu's case.

[JohnHwangBT]

All good ideas/tips. However, you sometimes will encounter individuals who don't care if you could/would make it right; which is what I think happened in carmachu's case.

And if I were put in such a situation, I think I'd note that as a bad experience with someone whom I wouldn't ever want to trade with (again), either.

"Beware! Unreasonable trader, very poor communciations - see BTR link"

[Ironhide]

FWIW, I think people who read the BTR on carmachu will see that the other trader was unreasonable, and that he was/is willing to fix the problems that occurred. I also think he has a good case to have his negative reference repealed if he so wishes to pursue that with Lin.

[carmachu]

FWIW, I think people who read the BTR on carmachu will see that the other trader was unreasonable, and that he was/is willing to fix the problems that occurred. I also think he has a good case to have his negative reference repealed if he so wishes to pursue that with Lin.

MM has taken care of that. I dropped her 2 PM's with offers to make it right and asked him to contact her. He tried so twice and gave her a time table to contact. She never has. So they went away.

I still have the model sprues pinned to my wall should she come back a month, 6 months a year from now. But seriously, all she had to do was contact me and it could be fixed.

Seriously, there's a model NOS waiting for her, and all she had to do was return contact and say "yes please send it".